When Life Gets Complicated: The Story We All Live
For months you pushed and pushed, trying to make it happen. Then one day you stopped trying so hard—and that's when everything clicked.
The sixteenth chapter of Genesis deals with this very feeling. It’s about longing, frustration, impatience, and the decisions people make when it feels like dreams are delayed and nothing is moving. But it’s also a map for what happens inside of us, in our thoughts and feelings, when we want more from life, when we want things we don’t yet have. Whether you’re a creative, an entrepreneur, a parent, or just someone with a dream, Genesis 16 is your story, too.
You're not separate from the field of awareness. You're a unique expression of it.
The Scene: A Family, A Promise, and a Long Wait
Let's look at the opening lines:
"Now Sarai, Abram’s wife, bore him no children. She had a servant, an Egyptian, whose name was Hagar. Sarai said to Abram, 'See now, Yahweh has restrained me from bearing. Please go in to my servant. It may be that I will obtain children by her.'"
Sarai (later called Sarah) and Abram (later called Abraham) are waiting for a promise to come true: they want to start a family, but it’s taking too long. Suddenly it hits you: wanted something so much that, after a while, you started looking for shortcuts or second-best options? That’s exactly what’s happening here.
Sarai represents the part of you that dreams and wishes. Abram is the chooser inside you—the part that makes decisions. And Hagar, the servant, is the part that takes action, sometimes when you’re not even sure it’s right. Every character in this story is actually a piece of your own awareness. This chapter is not about people who lived far away; it’s about how you respond when life makes you wait—and when you feel powerless to get what you want.
Getting Tired of Waiting: The Temptation to “Force It”
Your calling The bigger awareness speaks through callings—not just what you should do, but who you're becoming in the process. isn't something you find—it's something you build.
Think of a time you waited months (or even years) for something to change: waiting for a new job to come through, the right business partner, or for your creative idea to reach an audience. After a while, it can get frustrating. Sarai feels that way. She says, “God hasn’t given me what I want. Maybe I’ve waited long enough. I’ll just figure out a way to make this work.”
- Without warning, tried to force a result when something wasn’t happening fast enough?
- What happens inside you when you get tired of waiting?
Sarai gives her servant Hagar to Abram, hoping this shortcut will solve everything. In real life, this is like rushing into a business deal that doesn’t feel 100% right because you just want progress, or switching to a backup plan even if your heart isn’t in it. It’s the moment you trade patience for quick action—not because it’s wise, but because it’s hard to sit with longing and not-knowing.
Literal and Symbolic: Your Inner States at War
Let’s see what happens next:
"Abram listened to the voice of Sarai. After Abram had lived ten years in the land of Canaan, Sarai... took Hagar... and gave her to Abram her husband to be his wife. He went in to Hagar, and she conceived. When she saw that she had conceived, her mistress was despised in her eyes."
On the surface, this seems like a family problem. But look closer: Abram agrees because he wants the promise, too. Hagar becomes pregnant right away, but then everything falls apart. Sarai, who started this plan, now feels left out and angry. Hagar, who once served quietly, starts looking down on Sarai.
Life is like a GPS recalculating. Remember when ordinary to extraordinary seemed impossible
Think of Kevin, whose impatience to get married almost made him settle for the wrong person.
What does this mean for your life?
- Abram represents your ability to choose. Whenever you make a choice out of impatience, forcing things instead of allowing things to unfold, part of you pays a price.
- Sarai is your longing—your deep wish. When you move away from your true desire and settle for less, resentment and frustration build up inside.
- Hagar is the part of you that acts—sometimes with faith, sometimes just out of pressure. When you act from a place of impatience, the results never feel as sweet as you hoped.
Something inside always gets “despised.” You might get the project done, but end up hating the process or resenting partners you once trusted. Or you win the deal but lose your peace of mind. Life gives you what you tried to grab, but it never feels quite right. Why?
Why “Plan B” Hurts More Than It Helps
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Everyone has done it—gone for the shortcut, taken a client they knew wasn’t a good fit, or moved ahead out of pressure rather than true inspiration. On the outside, it might look like progress. On the inside, it just doesn’t feel true. You start blaming yourself, or even the people who said “yes” to your choices.
That inner fight—Sarai vs. Hagar, longing vs. forced action—is universal. Every entrepreneur, artist, or seeker knows it. Maybe you’ve seen it in a movie, too, like in the early seasons of “The Apprentice,” where eager contestants sometimes made rash decisions because they were desperate to win, only to regret them when honesty or patience would have served better. (If you don’t know, “The Apprentice” was a show where people competed for a business job with Donald Trump, who valued not just taking action, but also choosing the right action.) Sometimes, fast isn’t better.
- Can you find a time when moving too fast got you a result, but left you unhappy?
- Would you have chosen differently if you trusted more?
The Power of Pausing: What Happens When You Step Back
The story keeps moving:
"Sarai said to Abram, 'My wrong be on you! ... I gave my servant into your bosom, and she saw that she had conceived, I was despised in her eyes.' ... Abram said to Sarai, 'Behold, your maid is in your hand. Do to her whatever is good in your eyes.' Sarai dealt harshly with her, and she fled from her face."
Every invention existed in imagination before it existed in the world.
When we force things and then regret it, there’s often a tendency to blame others, get into arguments, or try to control what happens next. Sarai feels powerless and angry, so she makes things miserable for Hagar. Hagar, in pain, runs away.
This is the classic inner drama. You make a choice out of hurry or fear, it doesn’t work out as you planned, so then the part of you that took action wants to escape the whole situation—quit the project, leave the partnership, or just check out emotionally.
What can you do differently? Notice what happens next.
Gentle Awareness: Listening for Guidance in the Wilderness
Development Insight: Learning to distinguish between your voice and guidance.
Higher-level faith experiments involve trusting guidance even when it doesn't make logical sense.
Hagar, alone and desperate, meets a messenger, who asks:
"The angel of Yahweh found her... by a fountain of water... and he said, 'Hagar... where did you come from? Where are you going?' She said, 'I am fleeing from the face of my mistress Sarai.' The angel of Yahweh said to her, 'Return to your mistress, and submit yourself under her hands.'"
Notice how doubt blocks and trust opens. It's mechanical, not mystical.
In the middle of her pain, Hagar hears two simple questions: Where did you come from? Where are you going? These are the same questions any wise friend or mentor would ask when you want to quit out of frustration. When you feel lost, awareness meets you with a pause, a breath—a re-connection to your real purpose.
- What if, when you felt like running from discomfort, you paused and gently asked yourself: “Why am I feeling this way? What do I actually want in the long run?”
- Could that feeling of wanting to run be telling you to slow down and listen?
The messenger tells Hagar to return, not because suffering is good, but because she has a purpose that’s bigger than her pain. When you reconnect with your true desire (Sarai) and choose with awareness (Abram), even hard situations can help you grow. This isn’t about ignoring your feelings. It’s about listening deeply before jumping to another solution or quitting too soon.
Life Expands When You Stay Aligned
“The angel of Yahweh said to her, 'I will greatly multiply your offspring, that they will not be numbered for multitude.' ... She called the name of Yahweh who spoke to her, 'You are a God who sees.' ... Hagar bore a son for Abram. Abram called the name of his son, whom Hagar bore, Ishmael.”
Hagar returns, and her action (her “offspring”) becomes part of the bigger story. Even choices made in impatience can lead to growth if you pause, listen, and reconnect to purpose. Hagar names her experience “the God who sees,” recognizing she isn’t alone—there’s something greater that notices, cares, and guides, even in confusion.
This is an inner turning point: when you realize your awareness is always there, seeing you through every mistake and every choice. It’s when you recognize that even if you took a wrong step, things can work out when you return to yourself and listen deeply.
- What’s one area in your life right now where you want to do something just to end the waiting?
- What would change if you paused and asked yourself: “Where did I come from? Where am I really going?”
Bringing It Down to Life Today: How Genesis 16 Guides Your Actions
- Whenever you rush a process and ignore your deeper purpose, frustration grows.
- When pain or regret hits, the gentle voice of awareness always asks, “What is this really about? What do I actually want?”
- Returning to your true purpose, even after a messy decision, always leads you back to growth and new possibility.
- Every character—Sarai, Abram, and Hagar—is part of your own inner world.
This pattern plays out everywhere: the entrepreneur who pushes sales too hard, then has to recover customer trust. The artist who finishes a piece just to meet a deadline, then goes back to find the heart of the work. The family that chooses the easy fix, only to need a real conversation later.
Simple Exercise: Pausing for Realignment
If you’re rushing something right now, or tempted to take a shortcut out of frustration, just stop for two minutes. Ask yourself:
- What is the real desire at the heart of my waiting?
- Am I making this choice from faith, or impatience?
- What would it feel like to trust the timing more?
- What quiet guidance might I hear if I actually allowed myself to listen?
Write down the answers. Notice if your body feels calmer or if new ideas pop up that you hadn’t seen before. Let this be the pause that brings new awareness into your next choice.
Next Up: Genesis 17
In the next chapter, everything shifts. We’ll see what happens when you make a deeper commitment, and how a new name—a new identity—can appear after you reconnect to purpose. You’ll discover a bigger promise, and the way your awareness grows into it. The adventure continues, not by forcing results, but by returning, listening, and choosing again. You are never alone in this process.
Give your dreams space to breathe. Stop checking every five minutes.
Remember: every part of the story is inside you. The way forward is always to pause, listen, and let greater awareness show you what’s next.
